Merry Christmas 2009!

Your favorite spazzzz camgirl recorded this vlog for you in the wee hours of Christmas morn, and she hopes that you'll dig it while having a warm and wonderful holiday. (If you're into that kind of thing.) Isn't the frame this vlog's stuck on a horrible image of me? Hurry up and make it play so you can see that okay and not suffering from some kind of bizarre mental illness... Hey, wait a second... Just kidding!

And here is our new family member: Dutch, the Puppy Cyclone, who sat still just long enough for me to get this picture. So what do you think: German Shepherd/Husky Mix or is he gonna turn out more Border Collie?

Finally Moving Home To SoCal

That's right, tonight's our last night in Seattle! Our apt here is just about all packed up, and we're finally moving back home to Southern California. It's been a long time coming, that's for sure. We wanted to move away from here right after BigD's mom passed away, but we've been stuck with her house in probate all these long months, and now that *that* nasty shit is ending -- we're running for it before any more time passes. I'd like to say that we've remained unscathed, but probate is a truly evil process that has sucked us dry *and then some* unfortunately. Folks keep asking me *where* in Southern California we're moving to but all I feel comfortable saying is near Los Angeles. Remember, I've been recognized a few times over and since I'm not a full-blown celebrity type -- I'm entitled to as much privacy as I want. :)

I'm only anticipating being without an internet connection through Thursday, December 3rd so stay tuned for a rescheduled group show if you're a member of either of my sites: or Of course, I wished that I'd gotten another gallery update finished before I hit the road, but I'm confident that the set I've been editing will post not long after I arrive. Any time you do an out-of-state move it tends to get complicated, and my head's been fried with all of those relocation details.

So here's to hoping we have a safe trip down and for a better, more sunshine-filled life back home in Southern California. I'm not sure how much tweeting I'll do from the road, but there's bound to be a few. Follow me on Twitter:HERE if you aren't already.

Halloween Group Camshows N Stuff

Last Tuesday, I performed my first of two costume camshows of the 2009 Halloween Season & it was a hoot. With all that's been going on in recent weeks, I figured I'd just focus on the last two weeks of October with my usual costumey-enthusiasm. So I put on my Sexy Miss Freddy Krueger ensemble (minus the footware because I wanted to get make sure it was a good soles-in-fishnet pantyhose show) and had fun for an hour with my regular Camz viewers. I bought this costume last year to wear to BigD's company Halloween party and figured the red and green sweater dress would keep me and my little sweater puppies nice and toasty, hehe. Plus, I admit it, I've always wanted an excuse to have my very own "Freddy Fingers" -- Freddy's sinister glove with razor blade fingers is such fun to goof off with. So totally iconic! I could play with them forever!

Many years ago, when we were on like the forth or fifth "A Nightmare on Elm Street" installment, there was a phone-in contest where the contestants were asked three questions about the movies and your's truly called in. I got them all correct and won (what was at that time) the complete collection of movies on VHS and some collectible card stuff. That so ruled! I was thrilled to death that I'd *actually* won something. Of course, it wasn't too much longer before VHS became obsolete, but I kept those tapes for a long time -- my winnings! It wasn't until Christmas our first year in Memphis that BigD gifted me with the *now* complete dvd collection of some of my favorite scary movies. Okay, okay, so "A Nightmare on Elm Street Part 2: Freddy's Revenge" *does* suck badly, but I do occasionally bust out the others. I like both 1 & 3 a lot -- those two are the ones I've seen the most amount of times. And you know, I'm not at all sure what I'll think about the Michael Bay remake due out in 2010. The casting and trailer look decent.

Anyhoo, the replay of my Sexy Miss Freddy Krueger show is up for members of You'll want to try and catch it before I do my show on Tuesday, October 27th and the replay will be changed out with the show I perform that evening. With all of the system changes at Camz, there hasn't been a way for me to download and post more permanent archives of my group shows or make those highlight clips that they like to use for promotional purposes, but I'm sure they'll make my latest past shows available at some point.

In other news, much more sad news, we lost our TT on Sunday. Our older orange cat had been diagnosed with terminal lymphoma back in April. We thought he might make it with us on our *still* upcoming move back home to SoCal, but it just didn't happen. He was our best cat -- one of the best cats I've ever shared any time with, actually. Whenever someone would tell me "I don't like cats because they are/do ______" -- I'd tell them they'd like our TT (Tigger Two) because he had so few "negative" cat traits. He was the ultimate companion cat. In his younger days (when he was an indoor/outdoor kitty in Southern California), he would play with all of the neighborhood children, and they loved him. They'd actually knock on the door and ask if TT could come out to play. TT liked just about everyone, came whenever called, would lap-sit for as long as he was welcomed, and slept with us almost every night. We were lucky to have had him for as long as we did and suffering yet another loss this year, a year where there have been *so many* losses, was really hard. TT wasn't in much pain during his last moments; he was a trooper all the way to the end -- dying in my arms before our appointment to have him put to sleep last Sunday morning.

There are days when our cats are the only living, flesh and blood beings that I see aside from my husband because I work from home, and yes, because we haven't had children yet -- I do think of them as our babies and "our kids". I knew that Captain was going to have a hard time with TT's passing because even though they'd always had a Mr. Wilson/Dennis The Menace type of relationship. (TT being Mr. Wilson & Captain being Dennis for those of you who don't follow Cappy's clownish exploits on his twitter.) The days following TT's death were heart-wrenching with Captain meowing/searching for TT. All confused, he'd go hang out in TT's favorite places. And then there was acting out in other ways... The surviving cats have started peeing in places they shouldn't which is *really* abnormal for them. A sign they've been stressed out. I haven't caught anyone in the act just noticed afterward. Ugh. But, with each passing day, it's getting easier for all of us, and BigD and I are talking about the fun times with TT. Captain's been more attentive which has been cool.

I'm sure I could ramble on for a few more paragraphs about other stuff that's going on, but I'm gonna close now to get some shut-eye. It's only 5:24am now, lol. And another "Thank You" goes out to those who emailed or replied to me at twitter to send your condolences. Very sweet of ya'll!

Members Updated, Trashy Doll

Aren't I looking both trashy and glam all at the same time? Dressing up in those vertical-striped black thigh highs with my frilly "cuffs & collars" made me feel quite furiously sexy so I'm not thinking that this theatrical Doll look means that I'm as chaste as most real dollies strive to be all sexless with their pink parts carefully covered.

BigD came home after I'd only *just* started shooting and when he spotted all of the disposable plastic grocery bags around me and said -- "That makes no sense!" I batted by enormous faux eye-lashes back at him and replied with smooth "It doesn't *have* to make sense; I'm having fun." Trashy Dolls can happily pose and play in *trash* after all.

And since I have a love affair with my plastic bags (they have so many reusable uses!) I thought it would make for an awesome background that would, in part, cheer me up because we're still living in Seattle -- a place where they actually tried to impose a bag tax a couple of months ago. Argh. I'm simply not hippie enough to live here. I *do* reduce/recycle/reuse but I'm love love LOVE my plastic bags because they meet the needs of my household in a variety of areas. Remember, I've got four cats (until TT succumbs to cancer), a massive panty and lingerie collection, and a hubby who's a gamer. All of those benefit from a goodly stash of these plastic bags. I'm not an Uber-Green-Machine, and I don't want to be punished for not being one. Dislike my viewpoint and even hate me if you must -- but being lectured about not doing enough when I already feel like I *am* doing enough has gotten old. And it makes me grouchy. And rebellious.

I'm not saying all of this because I want to spurn a conversation/debate over the topic of recycling (particularly when much of it really does seem to mostly be about our feelings and what our pocketbooks might be feeling and that is tied to a bunch of other Bullshit). I am merely relaying my own personal feelings and how I arrived at this plastic bag playground for this photo set for Pretty easy to see where I shop the most too, huh? I do loves me some Target, Safeway, QFC, 7-11 and the Spirit Halloween Superstore. Mmmm hmmm.

So, let's get on with other things worth mentioning about this photo set. Did I already tell you that there are exactly 99 self-taken pictures this time? Well, there are! I figure that another shoot or two and I'll be back in the self-pornography groove. I'm especially proud of those that start around #26. (That would be the first sample up above there.)

Members can see the entire set inside my site, and if you're not a member and would like to -- please visit my sign up page to get hooked up!

Star Wars Links Worth Hitting

I've been on a roll recently with sharing some amazing/sexy/adorable Star Wars links via my twitter lately, but I know not everyone catches me for every tweet as I am somewhat of a twitteraholic. Why not share them here too. I have selfish reasons too, of course, if I blog about them -- then I don't have to keep them as bookmarks. I can just pull up my blog and revisit.

"The Amazing"

The Ultimate Star Wars Apartment

Now, this place is probably the most tidy looking nerd palace I've ever seen. Most collector homes are chock full of not only collectibles but clutter as well. Originally spotted at Gizmodo via this link that was posted by Adam Frucci I believe I might have seen it elsewhere but am not sure now. I think the only things that are missing are the original Star Wars stuff of the Hasbro action figure variety. It's entirely too grown-up over there and needs some kids toys in the mix. It's possible that those are loaded up, still in their original blister packs, hidden in the closet or under the bed. If you think the above picture that I snagged is cool, then you need to see the whole set. And then, read all of the totally jealous user comments. So many boys, so green with envy over other boys collections -- trying to dis it all the way instead of appreciating it for the super stellar spectacle that it is.

"The Sexy"

Galactic Empire Corset Collection

Aren't these Star Wars corsets the freaking bomb? I was completely *blown away* by how original and how sexy these are. And if I were in the market to spend $500-600 on something Star Wars-y, this would be at the top of the list. If pressed to pick between the Galactic Lord or the Galactic Trooper, it would be the Galactic Lord Corset all the way. The matching shrug with floaty cape are divine! And how terribly practical that it also comes with a utility belt. Somewhere to put the keys to the Death Star! :) I first saw these gorgeous costume pieces on Spike, but a quick search on Google turned up the actual maker: Evening Arwen.

And yeah, I saw the Star Trek corsets over at Spike, but ya know, those just weren't quite tickling my fancy. They aren't nearly loaded, are they? ;)

"The Adorable"

Animals With Lightsabers

How can you go wrong with Animals With Lightsabers? See, you just can't. And doesn't the photo above look like it could be my Captain? It's not, of course, it's a white kitty named Roxy. There's a variety of animals wielding lightsabers with more photos being added all the time, so it's good to stop by periodically to see what you missed. Ocassionally, you'll even get a fun Jedi Animal video. A sure way to lift your spirits & celebrate the Force at the same time.

CamZ Group Show Didn't Happen Today

Unfortunately, Camz went down today *right before* my weekly 1-hour group camshow was scheduled to start at 7pm ET / 4pm PT. I'm sure it was just another case of unknown/unexpected technical difficulties with their latest system changes. Nevertheless, I was on time and ready, and I hit my twitter to fill everyone in on what was going on as it was happening. Here's the three funny/sexy 12 second videos that I recorded to show off what I was wearing:

Well, it looks like Camz is down. But I was ready on time, see?

So a great big WTF with an !

Think I should surprise hubby in this lil ensemble?

So after goofing around and recording those, I decided to test out a free twitter-friendly cam service called because I figured why not sit & chat while dressed up in my sexy red and black Cuban heel stockings before BigD got home. Things were purely non-nude as per their TOS, but it was a nice way to feel connected for a few moments with my site members and non-members alike -- after we figured out to use the chatroom to communicate with each other, of course. Not the easiest, most-streamlined method for webcam broadcasting, but my impromptu chat seemed to go over pretty well, and we appreciated the venue. I rambled up a storm about music and stripping and television shows and stuff while only getting tongue-tied a few times here and there. There was no clock at CamTweet, but I'm fairly certain that my free webcam stream lasted for 40-50 minutes or so and the quality wasn't half bad. The experience was a reminder that yes, webcam stuff can be fun *even* when it's just all talking and me playing with my hair while not getting naked.

I'm not sure that I'll be able to easily slip into another CamZ Group Show timeslot this week to attempt a make-up show, but if I can -- I will be sure to post it the members area & on my twitter. (And yes, I realize that my tweets over there in the sidebar of my blog are looking like ass -- I need to figure out a prettier way to display them. I just don't have it figured out yet.)

Members Updated, Green One Piece Swim Suit

I thought about shooting a set in my green one-piece suit all summer long. I knew I wanted to have wet hair and generally look "mussed" -- maybe how I'd look if I'd been out by the pool reading in the afternoon sun. Taking time out every so many pages to go get wet in the pool. But what to read? Well, to start, I could get sucked in by The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection From The Living Dead by Max Brooks. And after reading several chapters on weapons, combat training and fortress building, I could decide that I need something sexier than a future zombie outbreak and dive into Nancy Madore's Enchanted Again, More Erotic Bedtime Stories For Women because I'd enjoyed her first collection of erotica-inspired by classic fairy tales so much. Yes, that's it, just what I need to escape from my everyday reality and get turned on at the same time. I mean, how can you go wrong with a way more grown-up and turned lusty version of "Peter, Peter Pumpkin Eater" or "Humpty Dumpty"? See, you just can't. And that's where the collecting my colorful pool towel and running to the security of my bathroom comes into the story. Where I end up should be pretty obvious...with my fingers down my swim suit fingering my soaking wet pussy.

Not a member but would like to be? Head on over to the JOIN page of & get signed up to see the rest of this photo update.

Members Updated, MySpace Sucks! And Panties

Okay, so I know that I'm late with this cute MySpace Sucks T-Shirt. Now it's totally easy and even trendy to hate MySpace because FaceBook is the new cool kid at school, but I bought this tee-shirt when I lived in Memphis and at the height of the MySpace Rage -- and it wasn't as cool to dislike MySpace. Everyone was going on and on and on about how much fun MySpace was back then. After being asked "Do you have a MySpace Page, Amber?" 40 gizillion times, I caved in and signed up. And then I was instantly aggravated with all that was (and still is) MySpace. Users are able to do so many bad, bad things to "personalize" their pages that too frequently wind up making those of us who view these pages wish our eyes and ears would leak of our skulls. So much so that I can't bear to login there very often. I've landed on too many truly horrible, almost completely unreadable MySpace Pages. The whole site is messy and loads slowly even before you get to the zinged-up individual profiles. Pink text on a dark blue background that flashes because it's this giant .gif file? Check! Two music files and one video all loading and then playing at the same time? Youbetcha! Unresized pictures that force you to scroll horizontally for miles and miles of pixels? Mission accomplished! For every pretty page, there's gotta be like 50 ghastly ones.

And then there's the whole you "can't be naked on MySpace" issue. Well, you *can* be naked but you can't show any of the good stuff. Unless you're crafty or lucky or don't mind rebuilding your MySpace Page and friends lists over and over again because you've had your account deleted. That alone makes it a huge time-suck waste for someone like me who already has a web-presence where she can do whatever she wants whenever she feels like it. So why would I stay again? Oh, so I could tell people about said web-presence? Nope, that would technically be a violation of their TOS because I'm adult content. So between the uber-slow page loads, the dreadful "It hurts my eyes, make it stop, make it stop!" profiles, the no nakey-nakey, and the no advertising amateur porn urls -- I was never down with MySpace. That's why if you go to my page there, you'll see my friends number is quite low. It's funny, I *just* logged into MySpace while I'm writing this to see how many new messages I might have and the freaking site has locked up my browser! Talk about icing on the cake. If it weren't for a few folks that use MySpace exclusively to reach me because *they* prefer it to old-fashioned email, I'd probably never go there again. There have always been better options for getting to know people online, and with new social networking sites springing up literally every day -- I'm not nearly as riled up as I used to be by MySpace. (I hope that I've not offended anyone with trip down "MySpace Sucks!" memory lane. All of my stripclub friends really, really like MySpace so I don't think any less of anyone who does, I swear. It's just not for me.)

My MySpace Sucks tee-shirt is most comfy and had the good fortune to be paired up with an equally cute pair of black fullback string bikini panties with little metallic gold stars. If you've missed seeing me in my spex lately, this is the gallery for you! Plenty of panty play: my hand down inside my panties, pulling my panties up tight before I pull them down, then stretching them a bit with my feet before I finally take them off. It's a very teasing gallery with an abundance of sweet photos (And yes, this gallery was shot by Trixie. How'd ya guess? *wink*). 96 images round out this set inside the members area of I had fun letting my snarky nerd out while showing off my panties and pussy, so I hope you'll have fun checking out this update.

Naked Girl Does Some Twitter Twaddle Vlog

I *probably* shouldn't have recorded this but sometimes I just can't help myself.

Special Note to More Polished Webwhores & Adult Entertainers: This vlog ramble was recorded to help illustrate how blind some twat-heads are on twitter about women having rights over their own bodies to do with as they will and NOT a criticism of cosmetic surgery or just plain ole being more glamorous than your's truly. (I might even want some someday! And no lip from you boys who've followed me for years about "ruining my look" either = It's my body to do with as I want, when I want, enough said.) So I apologize, folks, if I'm coming across that way because it's unintentional. I'm supporter of your right to be The Decider. You alone ARE The Decider of your own life/body, after all. Muah!

Special Note to Blind Twat-Heads On Twitter: See, you got what you wanted, attention from a genuine Naked Girl On The Internet, ain't it cool? I'm sure you were super thrilled that I recorded this "NAKED" - huh? This is a pretty good glimpse into the real person behind the twitter ID that you've been following for weeks, months, a year(?) and still don't know. I encourage you to take the "Stop Being A Twat-Head Challenge" and join my amateur panty porn site and get to know me via my picture galleries, videos, and live webcam shows. Here's a link to the JOIN PAGE of I promise it'll be a lot of fun if you do. Even if it's just for educational purposes, you *might still* be inclined to jack-off to the nerdy hotness that is AmberLily. In her natural state, in her artificial state, in the state of Washington. There ya go. If this hasn't sold you, I don't know what will.

Special Note to Other Often-Frumpy Webwhores & Adult Entertainers: Are you calling me out on my sloppiness? Think you're more "carefree" with your online appearance? Fine, you very well could be. Guess we'll just have to have a slumber party where we give each other make-overs while I try to get you to watch Season One of LOST and you try to get me to watch Season One of Deep Space Nine as we debate who has earned the title of Most Slovenly Slut. I'll bring the scrunchy hair ties and the Oil of Olay! You make the popcorn!

Special Note to the Choir: Thank you for enduring *yet another* blog entry where I've gone off on quite the rambling rant. I promise you'll be seeing me as The Pretty Girl very shortly. I honestly do like my version of The Pretty Girl and am glad that you do too. I most sincerely appreciate you folks in the choir that I've ended up preaching to *again* most of all. Especially your infinite patience with my personal life issues getting in the way of our having all of the fun I dream of us having. I'm making every effort to stay the course and not become another retired webgirl statistic. Hang in there for me knowing that I *really am* doing the best that I can. *Endless Thank You Hugs*

Gone Fishing, Geeking Out & Being Way Hot

My plan is to drop off a bunch of pictures for this entry because, well, there have been a few I've shared via my TwitPics that I think deserve their own special blog entry.

First and foremost, I went fishing!!! BigD mentioned a few weeks ago that he'd really like to give it try and go fishing. Neither one of us had been for like over twenty years, so naturally, neither of us really remembered *how* to fish. After consulting a few online sources for where to go and what to target at a few of the nearby lakes, we went all official and got licensed. I picked out a very girlie pink fishing rod and matching baseball cap. See? And on one of our first days out (since by now we've been a few times out) -- I caught the first fish last weekend, a pretty rainbow trout!

It's been nice to get the old man out of the house. We're not really the outdoorsy type, but I think we're doing pretty good with the couple of trips we've made thus far. I'll do whatever I can to get BigD interested in something that allows us to get more fresh air. Although, I do wish that I could talk him into driving a bit further away from the burbs so we could find a place that's remote enough that I could try to shoot some Naked In The Great Outdoors pictures and/or videos. Even if he chooses not to hold the camera (he's terribly opposed to that unless I've a co-star) -- he could at least play look out. So far, no such luck on that. You'll be the first to know if that changes, of course.

And then last weekend was Comic-Con 2009 down in San Diego, CA. For those of you reading this who *aren't* of the nerdy-persuasion, that particular convention is sort of a big deal to Star Wars fans because it's where Lucasfilm chooses to release cool new stuff to get us all worked up over. Some years are better than others with that but even if *that* part of Comic-Con doesn't fully satiate -- there's so many other things to geek out over that it's something we don't miss altogether even if I have very little desire to attend the convention myself. Comic-Con is way, way too crowded. Watching the coverage on G4 is plenty good. Especially when it's being brought to by hot nerd chicks like Olivia Munn. Yes, yes, I'm a fan. How'd ya guess?

So also last weekend, I let little AmberLeia out to play and put on one of my Star Wars t-shirts and did my hair up in Princess Leia buns to play on cam. I'm glad that I did. Not everyone was a fan of that particular look but the majority of the folks who wandered into my chatroom were cool with *my* being a fan even if they weren't. I have a real hard time believing that there are actually people who *haven't* seen any of the Star Wars movies (old or new trilogy!) but sure enough -- they do occasionally cross my path and I have to explain myself. How many inside jokes must these folks miss while being out and about in the world? There are so many pop culture references to Star Wars that I can't imagine not getting those. Man! At the very, very least, see the first film. You shouldn't even be able to *say* you're a nerd or a nerd-sympathizer unless you've seen Star Wars IV: A New Hope. Even go the Special Edition route. Just see it already. Unless you were just born yesterday, you're way overdue. ;)

Speaking of overdue, I'm feeling as though I'm way behind on a number of projects (including members updates) and some of that is because of the heat wave we've been experiencing here in Western Washington. The temperature sky-rocketed to as high as 107 this past week which is pretty abnormal for this neck of the woods. It's pissed me off royally because SEATTLE DOESN'T BELIEVE IN AIR-CONDITIONING!!! The locals like to think that it doesn't get hot enough for air-conditioning. I've heard all sorts of things from these loonies. Stuff like: "It's only hot for a couple of months, tops!" being one of the latest sentences said to me while I was in line to by the last fan in the store in a pathetic attempt to cool off my home office. (If you've kept up with my twitter or caught up with me in my group Camz show then you've already heard my snippy reply to this asinine statement but please bear with me while I say it again here because I really want to write it all out for posterity's sake. We won't be living here forever, after all.) --With sweat running down my chest and through my shirt, I replied to Madam Crazytown: "Where I come from, we call that SUMMER, and we have air-conditioning." And true enough, no one bothered to tell little Miss Hot Under The Collar and Hot Every Freaking Where Else any differently.

Any rental place that's in a location that gets above 85 degrees *should* have A/C. It just should. It should be an option. If apartment complexes in this area can offer stupid security alarm systems, they can offer air-conditioning. It's just one of the many things that irks me to no end about Seattle. Because guess what, it was hot last year at this time too. This is not a new phenomenon. The temperature finally did break late in the week, and now we're only in the 90's so that's been better. Some relief is better than no relief.

I did, however, answer a whole bunch of email on the day that I was waiting for our apt manager to come in and do our annual unit inspection. I didn't get back to everyone, but I was able to let a few folks know that I've not forgotten about them. :) I'm in the process of coming up with new stuff for updates, and there are a couple of things I'd like to change on the free side that I'm confident I'll get done. Maybe after my brain has soaked in enough Frozen Mango Pieces to think properly. That could be any day now. In the mean time, those shows that I did in my Star Wars t-shirt and cute black panties are in my PrivateCamz archives -- along with the one pantyhose-lovers might like where I play in some cream-colored hose. Hopefully that will entertain until I can get more sexy stuff going on.

Head on into's members area to see the shows >>>>

Members Updated, Spider Web Chaps

That's right, it's Halloween year-round when you have hot outfits like this one in your lingerie drawers. This is another one of my most favorite exotic dancer outfits that I felt it was necessary to photographically document. The girls at the club would call these chaps even though they don't connect at the waist and are technically leggings. Whichever you prefer, they have a certain way of drawing more attention to the parts that aren't covered in the behind region. Definitely THE outfit to wear if you're feeling cheeky.

Anyhoo, there's over 100 snaps of me posing in this outfit for members of If the background looks a bit familiar that's because, yes, this is another Trixie-As-Photographer photo set shot at her home. (Thank you, *again* Trixie for having me over and shooting so many nice pictures of me.) I'm glad that one of my leggings/chaps outfits has finally made it into pictures. I've quite literally gotten a lot of mileage out of this particular outfit. That might be more obvious if I posted more pictures, but it's no accident that the outfit shows the most wear in certain areas. The little green spider webs are faded at the knees, the inner thighs and the gstring. A testament to how much fun I had dancing. ;)

Mmmm, yes indeedy...

Oh, got mentally sidetracked for a moment. In other news, I should have something *especially* worthwhile to share within the next day or two. I hope anyway! The news might break on my twitter first. So if you've got an account there, by all means follow me.

What AmberLily Wants, A Rant

Just a warning, this is a little rant I've wanted to make for awhile now, and as a rant -- it won't be totally logical or make sense for most folks, but maybe it will help illustrate where I'm coming from. And what better day to make it than today when Sarah Palin resigns as governor of Alaska.

I wished people didn't think that look like Sarah Palin and Tina Fey because it COSTS ME MONEY.

Not sure how I got to this conclusion? Has my ego just instantly swollen up a couple of dress sizes because I've compared myself to two very famous people? Sure, it has, but what I've said still more true than I'd like. Throughout the last presidential election, I made a conscious effort to *not* be publicly political because in all honesty -- it's just not very me. I didn't and still don't have much faith in our elected government and spending much time thinking about it only adds another knot in my already severely knotted-up stomach. My own personal life overwhelms me. If you're spent any time on my blog, then you already know that.

So I didn't blog, or tweet, or talk about the election or its players in camshows. But that doesn't mean that it didn't reach me. Even without my being an outspoken crusader type, politics got into my work, my sex work. Against my wishes. Against my will. I've been caught in the middle of something I don't claim to fully understand, and it sucks. It costs me money because I bear just enough of a physical resemblance to both Sarah Palin and Tina Fey for me to be likened to both of them and what they represent. It's that last part that's causing problems for me. What do they represent? A whole mess of ideas that usually don't involve people's dicks getting hard or pussies getting wet. Ideas that make most people in my webcam show chatrooms angry or hostile or at the very least prone to belittling or ridiculing ME. It's particularly bad in my private camshow chatroom. People have turned me into a stand-in scapegoat, and it hasn't been fun.

Sure, there's been a few folks who've intended for their "Hey, you look like Sarah Palin/Tina Fey!" to be a compliment, but the nitty gritty is that the majority of the time what follows isn't pretty. If my one-on-one camshow chatters see me more as Sarah Palin then it's the perfect catalyst for them to try to abuse me because they don't like her. Vent all of their political frustrations on to me because she's not as directly accessible. I remember one private camshow I had where all my viewer typed throughout our session was verbiage along the lines of: "Yea, gonna hate fuck that republican pussy til it busts open" or something like that. It was more than I wanted to deal with, something I hadn't anticipated as we hadn't really discussed it beforehand, but at least I can console myself with the fact that was a show that I earned money for and maybe I provided much needed therapy in a safer venue for my aggressive chatter than if he'd wanted to take his frustrations elsewhere. I'm a big girl, I can always "End Show" if I'm being asked to perform in ways that I don't like or am not capable of. Ending a private camshow session is something I've very rarely resorted to because it's largely unnecessary. I've been a camwhore long enough to screen out unsuitable shows based on what my chatters say before we even have the opportunity to "go there". Obviously though, my experience and intuition aren't 100% infallible.

Most of the time, my chatters tend just use my look-alikeness as the excuse for NOT getting a private show with me. If my one-on-one chatters preferred to see me more as Tina Fey, then they seemed to have more expectations that I'd be more funny than I really am, and this REALLY takes us off course. My job is to be a sexual turn-on, and my sensual energy has a price tag on it that's paid in a per-minute-fashion -- not do a comedy routine in my free chat lobby for FREE. I suppose I could try to be more funny if asked to be so in a paid-for show, but you know, I've never been asked for that. Not once have I been asked to perform stand-up comedy in a private show.

I had high hopes that after the election was over that my term of being a Just-As-Good-As-A-Palin-Punching-Bag would be over too, but both Sarah Palin and Tina Fey have gone supernova famous, and there is no end in sight. It doesn't matter if Sarah Palin resigns as governor because she's not going to permanently leave public eye. Anyone who thinks she's going to fade away must be more blind than I am when I take off my "Sarah Palin Glasses". *Grumble grumble*

Perhaps what most bothers me, since I'm doomed to be a Palin/Fey look-alike, is how MEAN and HATEFUL so many liberals, people who claim to be "so much more fair and open-minded" are towards Palin. I don't want to be slammed for saying this, I'd love to remain all Swizterland-Neutral/Non-Political/Warm & Fuzzy, but maybe after reading all of this rant, it might occur to some of those in anti-Palin camp that being so consumed by hate/fear/loathing that you're constantly getting personal and blasting her and her family in your twitter isn't showing anyone how your political stance is better. It's breeding more of the same and that same winds up in my chatroom trying to hate fuck me or just fuck me out of money. It truly bothers me that it's probably because Sarah Palin is an attractive female that she is hated WAY MORE than her fellow male conservative counterparts. The way the hate missiles are launched at her and her children most likely wouldn't have happened if she had been born with a penis.

And it's not helpful that I'm not even the slightest bit flattered to be compared to Tina Fey. I never watched 30 Rock and I seldom catch Saturday Night Live, but I did hear about her interview in Vanity Fair and that's pretty much turned me off. Way off. I felt personally insulted when I read this: "I love to play strippers and to imitate them,” says Fey. “I love using that idea for comedy, but the idea of actually going there? I feel like we all need to be better than that. That industry needs to die, by all of us being a little bit better than that." Which industry is is that needs to die? Oh, right, the one I happily work in of my own choice, the adult entertainment industry.

Le Sigh.

Was this rant long enough for you? It's more than I intended to write, that's for sure. I wanted to unburden myself, and I'm certain that after I hit "Publish Post" that I'll instantly feel better. It's not as if I'm in a bad mood today or anything. I'll just be sure to NOT wear my glasses tonight when I webcam. I'll put on half a pound of black eye liner, a full pound of eye shadow, and lots and lots of red lipstick. Maybe then I'll look like the fun & sexy adult entertainer that I strive to be. Meow.

AmateurCamz/PrivateCamz Update

The owner of Camz sent all of the performers on the Camz network an email explain the recent tech issues: As it turns out, the building where the computers for Camz are hosted was to receive an upgrade to their air conditioning. Instead of doing the A/C units one at a time as instructed, they shut down all of the A/C units at once. The temporary units brought in were not enough to keep the data center cooled. This caused the data center to overheat and machines were shut down. The hosting company was not at fault since they were not even notified of the air unit upgrade. However, the end result was Camz lost a few core machines. This caused a great deal of downtime and instability. Long story short is that Camz has the new machines and is nearing the completion of many of the transfers that will once again add stability to the network. They've even taken it a step further and set up redundancy to their core machines to avoid issues like this in the future.

So there we are. You know what I know. What I wrote above is pretty much a regurgitation of the email I received. I'm optimistic that the worst is behind us and that my regular one-hour shows will more *regular*. My current weekly showtime is still: Tuesdays, 7pm ET / 4pm PT. See you tomorrow? Join my site to get a ticket to the show and see thousands of naughty pictures & hours of video of me to boot.

CamZ Group Show Not Happening = Tech Issues

Figured it would be a good idea to record a vlog explaining about my group camshow situation -- Camz has been experiencing quite a few technical issues over the last month or so, and so it's been a gamble whether or not my shows would still be, well, showing. I'm going to see what's happening with my support request, and if they can give us any sort of time frame on when their server problems are going to be over. In all honesty, I'm not sure that they'll have any specific answers to give. Problems just happen.

If you're a member of either of my sites or -- trust in knowledge that I will find another broadcasting method for my once a week group shows, if necessary. Stay tuned!!

Archie Andrews + Veronica Lodge = Forever

When BigD had first told me that my first comic book love Archie Andrews was proposing to Veronica Lodge in the 600th issue of Archie, and that it was all over the news, I wasn't the least bit surprised. Not even a smidgen. (Well, okay, I was surprised it was all over the news since "Archie" hasn't been a mega-trendy comic in awhile now.) If Archie was ever going to be forced to choose between Betty & Veronica, my vote was for Veronica as she made the most logical sense. I know, I know. That's not the answer you'd expect from me, is it?

I read Archie Comics for a few years mostly during the span of junior high (or middle school as it's called in Southern California) and have quite the collection gathering dust in storage down there at BigD's mom's house. I used to draw fashions for both Betty & Veronica and even had one of my designs chosen for Veronica in an early issue of her self-named title. I also used to write little articles or reports that the kids send in to Archie Comics that they in turn publish within a few of their titles and award small monetary prizes to. Winning those 1st & 2nd prizes with checks for $10/$12 (the exact amounts escapes me) not only were my first publication credits but totally fed my comic collection -- the funds literally went back to Archie in the form of subscriptions to all of my favorite titles. "Betty's Diary" was at the top of my list. Entire issues all from Betty's perspective. I loved Betty. Betty Cooper is the epitome of the "girl next door." Always sweet. Always doing the right thing. Always so conscious of what others feel and think. Always. And she never changed, at least not much over the years I followed her inner most thoughts. Too often, an almost complete doormat to Archie; he walked all over her in favor of Veronica without even a second thought most of the time. It was heartbreaking. The times that Betty actually did win Archie's attention were bittersweet.

The argument should not be Betty versus Veronica for the role of wife to Archie, but rather -- why would Betty want to be with someone who never truly appreciated her natural beauty, talents or intellect anyway? Archie's choice was clear to me years ago. The epitome "boy next door" wants what he wants, and he wants the stunning brunette heiress who has *actually* had some character growth in recent years. True, I haven't picked up an issue since I moved out of Memphis and left my favorite comic book shop behind, but at last glance -- Veronica wasn't a spoiled brat princess *all* of the time. Okay, so she'd still be flippant with her friends feelings, but she *learned* from her mistakes and made more efforts to be more like Betty while still being herself in the stories I remember. Veronica isn't heartless or brainless, and is more than just Gossip Girl precursor. Don't believe me? Go on, pick up a few of her issues, and you'll see she's more complicated than that. To say that Archie's making a mistake, isn't giving the characters, or the folks who've shaped them, enough credit. A marriage between Archie and Veronica is more challenging for those characters. There's more passion between them. Archie has never said that he sees Veronica more "like his sister" than his girlfriend. Once you hear words like that come out of Archie-kin's mouth, how can anyone think that his ultimate choice would be Betty Cooper?

Naturally, I'm not sure that I believe that this wedding will take place, that the legendary love-triangle will truly end. But it looks like I need to find my way to a comic book store, ya know, just to be sure.

Members Updated, Wand Grinding In White Panties

Posted a new video for members of my site this morning: Wand Grinding In White Panties. It's 13+ minutes of my grinding on top of my Hitachi Magic Wand (okay, okay so it's a rip off no-name brand wand massager actually, but most folks aren't paying attention to such meaningless details) while wearing white nylon/spandex panties. I'd say that these panties are pretty much in the boyshorts category except they fit a bit higher on the waist than many of my other boyshorts. And while they aren't in the "see-through" category, there is some definite camel toe action going on. My panties do get pulled to the side while I'm playing with my wand but they stay on for the duration of this video. Through the orgasm and all. A little tricky at times to keep my ass in front of the camera, I'd like to think it'll be memorable for members.


Whoa, so it's like 4:37am, and I'm dying for some shut-eye. Glad I popped in here to share the video caps for my latest self-filmed panty video. I'm sure I'll sleep a lot better knowing that I was so productive today: group cam show, private cam shows, twitter updates, 12 second video entry, members update, and a little blog entry *bragging* about all of today's accomplishments, lol.

Nope, Not Warm Enough To Go Swimming Yet

Even if it's not warm enough here in the Pacific Northwest for us UNfeathered types to take a dip, you won't hear Boy Duck and his companion Girlfriend Duck complaining. These two ducks are regulars at our apartment complex's pool. How do I know they're regulars? Well, since the Exercise Room is frequently closed with all of the remodeling this place is doing, I've started going on walks to help make sure I'm getting *some* kind of exercise and fresh air. I see Boy Duck almost every day I'm out. I wouldn't imagine that the chlorinated water would be good for them, but I'm not sure that there even IS that much going on chemical-wise since no one else is using the pool. Or probably even will until maybe next month. So Boy Duck and Girlfriend Duck have the place to themselves, and they give me something to look forward to after I've huffed and puffed my way up and down the steep nearby hills. I made sure to bring my camera with me this last time so I should share what a great couple they make.

I hope that everyone is enjoying their Memorial Day Weekend!

Members Updated, Aqua Panty Upskirt Tease

Yesterday, I posted a fresh video for members of Aqua Panty Upskirt Tease. Truth be told, there's a little more going on that *just* some upskirt action because technically, my jean skirt and soft matching aqua sweater don't actually stay on throughout the entire 15+ video. Filmed by my lonesome very early one morning, I had fun touching myself in these sheer pale aqua lace boyshort-style panties. (I know, I know satin panty fans, it's almost time for another video of me playing in satin or maybe even cotton since my last two panty videos were of the lace variety; we're almost there, I promise. *wink*) One of the best parts of this video, for me, was that you can really *hear* my fingernails working the lace crotch of these panties. Such a cool rubbing sound.

So! If you weren't reading my twitter when I announced that I had a new video up, by all means, get in there and check it out for me. I've not heard any comments, good or not-so-good about it yet. Still too fresh.

* * *

I expect my PrivateCamzing schedule to increase over the next week or so as we've been hit yet again with more unexpected probate expenses. Honestly, that loan that we've applied for *needs* to come through asap so I don't lose my freaking mind being nickeled and dimed (or, ahem, let's say *a lot more than* merely nickels and dimes at this point) with all of this costly probate/loan procedure shit. We could hear back next week or not depending entirely on their difficult-to-understand-makes-no-sense-to-a-regular-person time table (one that changes amongst the three different people we're working with too).

There we have it! I shall keep plugging along with all of the stuff that I've been doing and am only a wee bit behind on my email at the moment -- which is always good for my mental well-being. Almost as good as being all caught up, but that's more like a myth than a reality. Someone almost always writes me back right after my inbox is empty. Such is the way of email.

Members Updated, Cropped AmberLily Tee & Tube Socks

We're going to *pretend* that I'm a good blogger so I can bypass the usual "so this blog entry is late, please excuse my tardiness" and just jump into the free sample pictures that I've been dying to share. Posting this photo gallery update for members of earlier last week was definitely one of the highlights of said week.

And yes, as a matter of fact this IS another photo set shot by Trixie, how'd ya guess? ;) I think she did a great job capturing some of my smiling self wearing my favorite "AmberLily" tee-shirt. I had a couple of these shirts made back when I was dancing. I remember some of the other dancers giving me a "She's so full of IT" look when I first started wearing them. And then, after we all had to fight to keep our same stage names when Platinum closed and all of us (and more) headed to the *new* number one strip club in Memphis, The Pony -- and someone else tried to come over as AmberLily, no one was giving me those looks then. Instantly, the managers and staff *knew* who the real AmberLily was and my copycat bowed out with some other name inside of a couple of weeks. With hundreds of dancers all working the same club, the stage name fight got pretty catty during our transition. I was glad to be through with it early. Truth be told, the gals who already knew me weren't in the hater crowd. I might be a bit sassy at times but I very rarely go full on diva. My sense of humor and nerdiness get the better of me, and I simmer on down to be maybe a bit on the sarcastic side, but that's ultimately pretty easy to get along with. Totally user friendly. ;)

Still, this was undoubtedly my favorite of my customized baby tees. (Even if I did go at it with the scissors a bit too aggressively.) It went so well with my big white platform boots with the fur that aren't in this round of images. Those boots were like a miracle for my tired stripper feet. I could easily do 8+ hours in them because they were ├╝ber-comfy. They would get super sweaty which is where those near-pristine white tube socks would come in.

Join to see the whole 100+ photo set

And now on to other topics folks are wondering about...

I had intended to record a vlog that explains why we're not already in California by this point, but after our apartment building's fire alarm went off on the day I got the cam program all set up to record, I ran out of steam on the idea. The long and short of our moving situation is that we're basically in "Loan Limbo" and can't move until either our loan against the house in California that BigD inherited when his mom passed away in January goes through *or* the bank we're trying to use denies us and we can then use our credit cards to get there. (While your loan is being considered using any credit is highly discouraged as is any activity that affects your credit rating. Blech.) Naturally, option A is vastly more appealing but because lenders aren't lending the way they were prior to the economic crisis we're in -- it's been most frustrating. They'd rather give loans to first-time home buyers to try to get the real estate market back on track. Anyone in our situation with a home that's already paid off is being given the run around. It hasn't been at all helpful that we're dealing with an out of state title, probate, and a loan officer who's overwhelmed with her job. We're trying to keep our spirits up, but it's been rough, and I'll spare you the finer details.

So, yes, we're most desperate to get this whole move over with, but "Loan Limbo" has us hostage. We'll be playing it by ear for the next few weeks and maybe the universe will throw us a bone. (Are you listening universe? Please, pretty please, throw us a fucking bone already.) In the mean time, my time on webcam has me distracted and I'm glad for it. I've just hit 2000 one-on-one camshows, so that's been cool. I've been extremely fortunate to have had some truly spectacular camshow patrons. Thank you for taking time out to play with me recently.

Okay, going to close now. I want to try to wake up at a more reasonable hour so that I can telephone my mom and wish her Happy Mother's Day.

Pictures Of Our Newest Kitty, Fancy Pants

A few fellow cat-lovers have asked more about how Fancy's doing, so I thought I'd take time out to show off the latest addition to our feline household. Yes, this is kitty #4. I'm only two cats shy of being a "Crazy Cat Lady" according to Archie McPhee's Crazy Cat Lady Quiz -- six is the magical number. Naturally, I didn't set out to have this many, Fancy was inherited, after all. The other three: Princess Leia Kitty (or just Princess), Tigger II (or just TT), and Captain Friendly (or just Captain) were all rescued or strays that just happened to us. See pictures of them here on my favorites page. I think that's how it works for most people: cats, cats they *just happen*. All three of our furry babies have been terribly spoiled. My voyeur cam viewers have even commented on how much attention I lavish on them (when they think I'm not paying attention to the chatroom, I've seen their jealous comments).

Miss Fancy Pants is beginning to allow us the privilege of spoiling her too. She was used to being "only kitty" at BigD's mom's house, so being introduced to three other cats and in a much smaller environment was sort of a shock for her. Fancy holds her own ground though. That first picture makes her look more sinister than she really is. The second picture with her tongue out helps soften her look, I thought.

Can't you just imagine the FUN I'm going to have driving them all down to Southern California? Yes, I'm sure it'll be a real treat, lol. The chorus of meows will surely be deafening. Thank goodness this is the move home and the last time we'll ever do this. ;)

Members Updated, Teal Satin Bra & Panties

About time more pictures taken by Trixie surfaced as updates for, huh?

Here's what I wrote about My Teal Bra & Panties Gallery in the members area:

And man, what to say about this satiny set... We had fun shooting it, I've made sure to include some of the fun/goofy snaps at the end that shows it wasn't all about teasing in and out of my panties. Because this particular pair of panties is/was made of a really thin nylon/poly satin material, they really did pick up a fair amount of pussy scent while playing with myself in them in front of Trixie. So smelling them after I took them off was a must.

Trixie flattered me and cooed that I looked "just like Little J aka Jenny Humphrey from Gossip Girl" -- and that made me wonder exactly *what* she was talking about since I'm no blonde teen, but then later I checked out the pics to see what she meant. Much to my own surprise, #52 & #53 are looking *very* Jenny Humphrey, all innocent and wide-eyed in a few of the shots. I guess I still have it in me, even though I'm like, way older. (How old? I'm 33 at the present moment, for those of you who don't pay attention to numbers, hehe.)

This is a pretty basic set of bra and panty pictures, but I still love the cool lamp and the bookcase chock full of Trixie books. (Valley Of The Dolls & Mists of Avalon, anyone?)

Like shiny satin panties? Join my site to see this entire set of 119 photos.

I'm trying not to get too maudlin or pre-maudlin about the pictures that Trixie's taken of me (because we're moving away and all), but don't worry, I won't be holding back. They'll all be going up just as soon as I edit and build galleries for them.

Speaking of the move, no date is official yet. We've been not-so-patiently waiting on some legal stuff to happen with his mom's house and more paperwork just arrived yesterday, but I would expect that we'll know before too much longer if our end of April projection is true. I wished we were there already, of course. I'm dying for a Rubio's fish taco. And to see my mom, sis, and her fiance. ;)

Imaginary Scenarios I Indulged In Today

Er, yesterday. It's already 3:23am.

I'm officially behind on updating the members area of because I spent several days last week on my "Viral Vacation" as we're calling it around here. (My computer was infected with two truly nasty trojans that blew past my anti-virus/anti-maleware programs, yes PROGRAMS, plural, and made me afraid that my computer might even be unusable.) Thankfully, I was able to get back to my webcamming lifestyle on Sunday, that worst-case-scenario not a reality, so trust that a new gallery update really is on the way. I've had to make some adjustments to how I work, including switching from typically using Internet Explorer to Google Chrome. If you're anything like me, then even minimal changes like taking on a new browser can be irksome. But anyway...

To distract ourselves for a few moments in the mean time, here's a short list of three of my more memorable fantasies that I took time to dream out today:

--That I was a very wealthy man's cute, sweet trophy wife. A man who somewhat resembled my own BigD but was an assembly of a few other men I know or have known. Every part from personality to body familiar and un foreign. A man who had already done "the trophy wife thing" before with demanding, busty blondes who too quickly lost their shiny luster and grew too predictable. But a little, perky AmberLily goes a long way. I was left alone all day to read/watch all of the nerdy, sci-fi/fantasy novels/movies/tv series I wanted. Write lengthy geek posts defending my opinions on dorky message boards because I didn't have to *work* for a living anymore. And then at night, I would entertain my husband dressed as Princess Leia (in totally perfect, exact replica costuming, of course). Being a closeted nerd himself, he would be truly enthralled with this roleplay. Ah, bliss!

--That I was living back down in SoCal and was able to sweet talk innocent, barely-legal young women into letting me photograph their feet and up their skirts for a new website. Outside, on random street corners. A website that was as much fun (if not more fun) to run than either of my two existing sites. All of the other foot fetish/panty fetish webmasters would be totally envious of the sexy/hot/beautiful girls that I get to model exclusively for me, and my photographic skills would touted as sublime.

--That I was one of those tanned, anonymous people in those dreamy Corona commericals we see on television. That I was, yes, doing a whole lot of nothing for a small forever. Save sipping on a mellow, limey beer on a beautiful, sunny beach -- all warm and tropically luscious. Perfection right down to some sand in between my toes. Maybe even some sand up my butt crack for authenticity's sake. I do favor some reality. Even in my fantasy worlds.

No, I don't suppose these daydreams are terribly "politically correct" but then again -- they aren't *supposed* to be either. Pure silly indulgences that are necessary to keep the juices flowing.

There's No Place Like Home

I probably should have taken my drying contact lens out of my eyes before recording this, but hey, my constant eyelash-batting does help add to the "she's totally crazy/insane" quality to this late-night vlog entry that I hope you'll find endearing. Or at least somewhat informative and/or entertaining since you're wasting 5+ minutes if you don't.

Should you *not* take time out to watch it, say just perhaps you're only interested in *reading* about what's going on, here's the summarized version: We are moving back home to Southern California soon. How soon? Maybe like end of April soon. I'm not sure if I'll be able to get back to being a stripper (though I certainly hope to, if not SoCal then maybe Vegas from time to time - I didn't mention that Vegas part in the video but yeah...) but I do plan on keeping up with my website/camming stuff. I'm gonna try to update as regularly as I can up until the move and then be tied up for a couple of weeks and get back to it once we're just the slightest bit settled. Most of my die-hard members are pretty understanding. Big shit happens when a family member passes. Our main goal is to get back to our remaining family members and friends and feel more like life can start again.

I've felt like everything's been "on hold" ever since last March when we moved to Seattle this last time. I kept telling myself, "Oh, I'll do that after we unpack..." - "Oh, I'll do *that* after we move to the next apartment..." - "Oh, I'll do *THAT* after the weather gets better..." Makes things awful tricky when that's all you get to do. Instead of DOING things to make myself feel more at home here, I've deliberately put them off because there was always that next big something looming on the horizon. Too many moves. Too many changes. Too much work. Too little time. Being back in a more familiar surroundings and an easier-to-live-in backdrop is what I've been hoping for a real long time now. So while I'm not excited about packing and the actual headache that is moving, and I will miss being near Trixie & Delia, I am super relieved. I must sigh twenty times a day now knowing that our time here is drawing to a close. I know that Southern California is a good fit: it's home.

Seattle Feet, Brrr, Cold Feet

Okay, so I know that this isn't my Nymph Feet Blog but the cool part of my week last week was getting out and going down to the water (a whole five minutes from my apt) to shoot the pictures I needed for my feature over at Wu's Feet Links. It was almost the perfect day for shooting the "Seattle Feet" theme. Except that instead of just the normal rainy gray skies, we also had some snow the day before, and that made it too cold for me to want to take my feet out of my cute rubber rain boots. (Well, that and I've been sick. For as much as I've tried to pretend otherwise, my head cold with intense sinus pressure has scaled itself back into a moderate sniffly cold.) My fingers had a difficult time working the functions on my camera after only 15-20 minutes, so after I'd had enough fresh air, I do what a lot of us here in Seattle do: go to Starbucks for a steamy, hot beverage and get back indoors to warm up and cuddle with something to read (yes, my reading materials *are* Buffy related, a "TY!" goes out to Jose for the book) . At least, that's the storyline for my gallery, and I'm sticking to it. :) If you haven't already clicked on over, that feature has a free gallery of 45 pictures -- the two I'm using here aren't in the set, so what's over there is different.

So, I'm nearly finished with TWO updates for members of The first one is a selection of my CamZ group webcam shows. Not too terribly long ago, they made available our archives in .FLV format, so I should be able to offer those archives on a more regular basis. Actually, I've already uploaded those files, I just haven't made the page with their links yet. The second update coming *very* soon is a satin panty photo gallery. Again, 90% of those images have been edited, I only need to finish the little bit that's left and build the gallery pages and upload, upload away! I mentioned in my group show on Friday that my goal was to have those up before the weekend was out, and as you'll notice, that hasn't happened. I was close though, so close. I'm blaming my under-the-weatherness and a super busy Saturday night on PrivateCamz this time. Truth be told, I'm rather proud of what I was able to accomplish and all that I've been getting done lately.'s photo/video updates have been more regular the last few weeks and that makes me feel good.

And speaking of my group webcam shows. I've picked up my old time slot again, so my CamZ shows are now back on Tuesdays, 7pm ET / 4pm PT. I gave Fridays a try and kept the slot for about a month because I wanted to make it easier for folks to find me, but it's too tricky with needing to be back on for private shows Friday night. Talk about a full day, whoooo weee!

I'm starting to zone out, so I'm going to hit publish and see about a few other things before I turn in. It's only 3am and all. ;)

Joss Whedon's New Show Dollhouse: My Initial Thoughts

(Is it just me or does it look like we can *TOTALLY* make out Eliza Dushku's nipple through her thin little tank top in this picture?)

**Spoiler alert, if you haven't yet watched Dollhouse and want to keep it all a surprise for yourself, stop here and read no further and come back when you have.**

When I first heard that Joss Whedon was going to have a new show, I was stoked. Of course, I would loved for it to be another Buffy universe spin-off. Like "Faith" or "Spike" (OMG, how I miss my beloved Spike...) or even a "Dawn & Connor" kind of spin-off (wouldn't THAT be kinky?). I swear, any of those, and I would have peed my pants. But then, I read some online snippets about it being a new sort of show. Darker. More action (yes, more action than just slaying demons). The way Dollhouse was initially described, I thought it was going to be more like what we imagined the "Fox Force Five" pilot to be when Mia Wallace was talking about it in Pulp Fiction: a gang of hot babes with guns and knives going on dangerous missions being sexy bad asses. And well, that's not *exactly* too far off. Dollhouse is more complicated than that though.

I'm totally behind the show's premise which is -- straight from IMDB: A secret organization that employs mind-wiped DNA-altered humans known as Dolls who are implanted with false memories and skills for various missions and tasks. When they are not 'at work' they are living in a real life Dollhouse which gives the show the name. One of those mind-wiped humans, a young woman named Echo, is slowly starting to become aware of herself and what's going on - all the while somebody on the outside is trying to bring the Dollhouse down while getting closer to Echo - possibly not aware that she is one of the Dolls he is after.

But... But I'm not sure the Dollhouse is pulling all of that off with flying colors in the Whedon-style that we've become accustomed. I'm holding off my final judgement because we need to see more episodes. At this moment, I can't quite put my finger on it, but it just *feels* like it's trying too hard to work in the action sequences. I rather wished that the other characters, particularly Amy Acker's character, Dr. Claire Saunders, were getting more screen time. And how cool would have it been for one of the "evil nerd trio" from BtVS to play the part of Topher Brink since they're so similar? The second episode was enormously better than the first (which I've since learned was not the "original" first episode and possibly explains how it came to be as disjointed as I felt it was), and so I am partially reassured that Dollhouse could be the bomb. Still, to give us "A Most Dangerous Game" storyline for the second episode was, ahem, maybe a bit too cliche. The show has license to go into some very, very dark territory with this crisis of identity thing. Bouncing the Dolls back and forth from GFE providing fuck Dolls to bad ass ninja Dolls raises all sorts of issues. Maybe we'll even get to see some boy Dolls in action soon. Or at the very least, more of the Alpha-gone-awry storyline.

Was I the only one that loved hearing Eliza say: "It'll simmer your head meat down to a bubbly brainy fondue" in this commercial for Hulu? Now where is this sort of dialogue in the show? Does it really have no place in the Dollhouse? Hmmm...

Happy Belated Valentine's, Members Updated

Am I still timely with this latest update for Or are you one of those sticklers for punctuality? Or worse yet, you're a Valentine's Day Hater who doesn't want to play along with holidays that revolve around greetings cards, chocolates/candy, and sexy lingerie/adult novelties? See, I'm not, even back in the dark ages when I wasn't in a relationship -- I was all about the chocolates, lingerie, and sex toys. (Come to think about it, I think we could make a strong case that I'm *still* all about those last three things, huh? *wink*) You just can't go wrong with those. So a whole day that revolves around that tied with a big red bow. Okay, I'm game.

I've been trying really hard to get back into my webwhore routine, but I keep falling behind or getting side-tracked which is why I'm not going to beat myself up with my day-late Valentine's Day update. I got my picture gallery in on time, but that achy back of mine started acting up, and I was forced to take a time-out. I actually slept most of Valentine's away -- waking up only to go to Best Buy with BigD to pick up some (probably) non-romantic flicks on dvd. We haven't slipped Max Payne into the dvd player so we haven't seen it yet, but I'm going to take a wild guess that it's fairly minimal on the lovey-dovey subplot. And I'm good with that because we *did* finally get to see Zack & Miri Make A Porno and there was enough of that special sweetness to tide me over for awhile. Yes, Zack & Miri is totally adorable and the perfect gift to give to friends and family as a Valentine's present.

But on with the talk of my latest update! If you haven't already surmised from glimpsing the photographic samples accompanying this entry, this update was all about a sundress, an open bottom girdle, a sultry pair of stockings with a cuban heel, and my black pumps. I shot these pictures and video of myself in the wee hours of the morning a couple of days ago -- working with only the most basic of lamps so the pictures have moody quality to them that I rather like. It makes them feel more retro which is appropriate given that the girdle is on the old-fashioned side. I hope that my members will like them and the teasing 5+ minute music video too.

If you're not already a member and you've been *dying* to see me in more hosiery, then you'll be happy with my last couple of video updates -- updates that I haven't blogged about because the time got away from me. The join page is right here if you're curious.

Back In Seattle

Just a quickie post to let ya'll know that I'm back in Seattle. BigD's still down in SoCal for the time being, so many loose ends to tie up. I will be making a more wordy blog entry with all that's going on, or maybe even a video entry because that might be easier, but I did want to let everyone know that we're both doing okay.

I do have some happy news to report (which is new for those of you who don't follow my tweets) -- We've got a new addition to our household: a new cat! BigD's mom had an affectionate black and white long-haired kitty named "Fancy Pants" that flew home with me on Monday. (Boy, was that ever an experience. I've flown cats before but as cargo not as an in-cabin passenger.) So far, Fancy has been shy with our cats, but that's a good sign. Better shy than aggressive with lots of cat-fighting, I say. She's only 3 years old, so I'm hopeful that after she gets used to us, she'll be a playmate to our 2 year old Captain. And yes, Fancy makes us a four-cat household. My crazy cat lady status has indeed been reinforced. As if there were any doubts!

And now I'm off to watch Lost even though some East Coast fucktards have already spoiled part of tonight's episode for me because they were in my twitter's timeline and felt the need to give blow by blow details. Surest way to get me to unfollow you: spoilers with no warning of spoilers. I didn't do it when I was in an earlier timezone and demand the same courtesy. :)

Death In The Family

Earlier this evening we got the sad news that BigD's mom has just passed. It was sudden and totally unexpected. We're on an early flight to Southern California to take care of things, so my cam shows are on hold until I get back. I just want to say "thank you" to those of you who read when it happened in my twitter -- means a lot.

Panty Fetish Webcamming Is HOT!

Okay, so I don't regularly come in here to my blog and make posts about how *hot* my private webcam shows are. I have so many good one-on-one shows and cam so frequently that my blog here would be overflowing with posts if I did. Many of my shows are what I classify as "just general tease and masturbation" shows. In different flavors, of course. Some with lots of dirty talk. Some with hardly any dirty talk but with plenty of toyplay. Some where it's all close-ups of my ass from behind. Some where I'm pleasuring myself with two fingers in my pussy and my thumb on my clit and so on and so forth. Not everyone has a fetish or something specific they *need* to see to get off, and that's cool by me. But for those private show customers who DO have a fetish, and it's one of the fetishes that I enjoy catering to AND I'm allowed to take their ideas and run with them -- Man, I couldn't enjoy my job as a professional camwhore more.

Tonight was one of those nights. I had a couple of truly awesome panty fetish sessions that really got my juices flowing by the end of the night. So much so that I had to log out and make myself cum *a couple of times* before deciding to give my pussy a break and come in here to blog about it. The first panty fetish camshow was me rubbing myself through this roomy white satin bikini pair. That viewer wanted to see me make a wet spot through the fabric of the panty, and I was happy to oblige. (It was that show that the above screen cap is from.) Right after that show I had a couple of "general" shows and then this rare but quite arousing cam-2-cam session where the customer took a picture of me naked that he let me watch him take and print out so that he could jack off his incredibly meaty cock and shoot his hot load all over me. Me, in photographic form. Yes, I'm sure admitting how entertaining that show was to me was makes me sound extremely conceited, but c'mon now. That's not one that happens every day, and I'm more than allowed to enjoy it. Skipping ahead to the last shows of my night, I had the opportunity to share a few more pairs of panties with someone who'd seen the archive for the first panty fetish show. All of them bikinis but each of them different colors and fabrics. I saved a bright orange pair that I'd never played in before for last. Just pulled them to the side and let my fingers work my swollen pussy until our time was up. That orange pair of panties is definitely broken in now.

I'm not sure if any of the folks that I played with tonight are members of, but if you are and you're reading this now -- thank you! And a big thank you to those of you who've played with me over the holidays too. I know that my PrivateCamz archives probably shouldn't be considered "content" for my members area, but now that I've got over 1500 shows in there -- I feel like all of those hours of webcam footage that my members can check out should count. Especially after nights like tonight. :)